Name Calling
by meganthegleek
Summary: Sirius and Remus have some fun calling each other names. SLASH SBRL
1. Name Calling

**Title**: Name Calling

**Summary**: Sirius and Remus have some fun calling each other names.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"Sirius."

"Remus."

"Padfoot."

"Moony."

"Prat."

"Sweetness."

"Manwhore."

"Prude."

"Trouble-maker."

"Goody-two-shoes."

"Sly."

"Shy."

"Looks."

"Brains."

"Crazy."

"Calming."

"Quidditch."

"Reading."

"Pureblood."

"Half-breed."

"Human."

"Werewolf."

"Lover."

"Lover."


	2. Name Calling: Sirius & Remus

**Title**: Name Calling: Sirius/Remus

**Summary**: Sirius and Remus meet.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Sirius."_

"_Remus."_

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* * *

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Remus Lupin makes his way around the Hogwarts Express, trying to find a place to sit. He bumps into someone when he wasn't paying attention.

"I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going…" Remus started to say. As he was gathering his books, he notices a boy helping him without saying a word.

Remus stopped and watched him. The mystery boy picked up the last book, and handed it to Remus. "Would you like to sit with us? You look lost."

Remus smiled. "Sure, thank you." He took the book.

"I'm Sirius."

"Remus,"

Sirius smiled, leading the way.


	3. Name Calling: Padfoot & Moony

**Title**: Name Calling: Padfoot/Moony

**Summary**: Sirius shows Remus Padfoot.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Padfoot."_

"_Moony."_

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* * *

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Sirius looked at himself in the mirror and smiled. Tonight was a full moon and he was going to show one of his best friends, Remus Lupin, exactly what he can do to help.

"Sirius?" Remus says, as he watches Sirius just smile at himself into the mirror.

"Yes?" Sirius replies, not tearing his eyes from the reflection.

Remus raised his eyebrows and went up beside Sirius. He looked in the mirror and spoke softly, "What is it?"

Sirius turned to Remus. "Close your eyes."

Remus looked at him oddly, but shut his eyes.

"Moony." A bark.

"Padfoot," He smiled.


	4. Name Calling: Prat & Sweetness

**Title**: Name Calling: Prat/Sweetness

**Summary**: When Remus insults Sirius, Sirius can't think of a come-back.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Prat."_

"_Sweetness."_

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* * *

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"Maybe you and James wouldn't have gotten dentition if you two were careful like Peter and I were!"

"Oh! So sorry, Moony. We just wanted to have some fun."

"Don't you have dentition to go to?"

"As a matter of fact, I don't."

Remus fakes a gasp, "What a shocker!" Remus turns away and sits on the couch.

"Don't avoid me, Remus!"

Remus shakes his head, "You are such a prat."

Sirius stood there for a few seconds before saying, "Well, you're just a bucket full of sweetness."

Sirius walked out, leaving Remus wondering if that was sarcasm or not.


	5. Name Calling: Manwhore & Prude

**Title**: Name Calling: Manwhore/Prude

**Summary**: Sirius just got back from the fifth date in two days, and his friends have a few things to say.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Manwhore."_

"_Prude."_

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* * *

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"Hello, boys!" Sirius Black makes his way into his dorm, a smile spread across his face.

"How'd it go?" James asks, sitting on the bed.

"Amazing. I love girls, Prongs. And girls love me." Sirius joined James on his bed, smirking.

Peter was out cold. Remus didn't say a word, reading.

Sirius stared at Remus, waiting.

"Remus?"

"What?" Remus said without looking up.

"Aren't you… going to say something?"

"Like what?"

"A congratulations?"

Remus looked up, "Oh. Congratulations, Mr. Manwhore! You've succeeded five dates in two days. Amazing!"

"Shut up. You will always be a jealous prude and a follower!"


	6. Name Calling: Troublemaker & Goody2shoes

**Title**: Name Calling: Trouble-maker/Goody-two-shoes

**Summary**: When Sirius is bragging about getting in trouble, Remus doesn't exactly like it.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Trouble-maker."_

"_Goody-two-shoes."_

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* * *

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"Yeah, that was me." Sirius says to one of his "fans".

"How did you even hide?!" She asked, mesmerized.

"I hid in the corner," obvious, he couldn't tell her about the invisibility cloak.

"Oh my! Were you scared of getting caught?"

Before Sirius could answer, Remus mumbles something.

"What was that, Remus?"

"Nothing."

Sirius turned to the girl and told him that he could 'hit her up later'. He turned to Remus, "What?"

"You're stupid for bragging, that's all."

"You need to calm down, goody-two-shoes."

Remus stared at Sirius, "At least I'm not a trouble-maker that gets detention every day."


	7. Name Calling: Sly & Shy

**Title**: Name Calling: Sly/Shy

**Summary**: Sirius is hiding something, and Remus gets a bit frustrated.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Sly."_

"_Shy."_

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* * *

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Sirius sits outside looking at the stars, thinking about different things.

"Sirius?" he turns around to see who it was; Remus.

"Join me?"

Remus sat down, looking at Sirius. "Are you okay?"

"Just thinking a lot."

"Thinking about what, Siri?"

Sirius stayed silent, focusing more on the stars.

"Fine, don't tell me." Remus starts to get up.

"No, please stay. I just… I don't know."

"Sirius, why are so sly all the sudden?"

Sirius looked at Remus. "Why are you so shy all the time?"

"Sirius, do you know what sly means?"

"Kinda like shy? I'm not like you, Remus."


	8. Name Calling: Looks & Brains

**Title**: Name Calling: Looks/Brains

**Summary**: When all Remus wants to do is study and apply to his homework, Sirius calls him on it.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Looks."_

"_Brains."_

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* * *

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Sirius Black sits on the couch watching Peter and Remus hover over their Potions books. His best friend, James was watching as well.

"Will you two stop starring?" Remus says without looking up, feeling the eyes on him.

"Sorry. But… why are you studying? We don't have an exam for two weeks." James says.

"Because Prongs, we think ahead, unlike you two."

James opens his mouth to reply, but Sirius stopped him. "Don't you worry, Prongs. Moony's just the brains of the group."

James snickers and jokingly replies, "Says who?!"

"Says the looks." Remus says, smirking behind his Potions book.


	9. Name Calling: Crazy & Calming

**Title**: Name Calling: Crazy/Calming

**Summary**: After the four friends get detention, Sirius overacts.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Crazy."_

"_Calming."_

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"Bloody idiot!" Sirius explodes in the dorm with his three best mates. "I hate girls. They fuck everything up."

"Sirius, it isn't Lily's fault that we got caught." James tries to defend the love of his life.

"PRONGS! She's the **reason** we're going to detention for the rest of the month."

"Sirius, I think you need to breathe."

"I'm breathing just fine, Remus. See?" Sirius walks up to Remus and breathes right in his face.

"Will you please calm down? You're acting crazy, Padfoot."

Sirius starred at him, looking as if he's thinking. "Yeah, well… you're calmingness creeps me out."


	10. Name Calling: Quidditch & Reading

**Title**: Name Calling: Quidditch/Reading

**Summary**: Sirius is bored and wants Remus to do something with him, but Remus is too occupied with his new book.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Quidditch."_

"_Reading."_

* * *

Remus sits reading a new book that he just retrieved from the library the day before. Sirius sits watching him, patiently waiting to be noticed.

After a while of waiting, Sirius started to whisper the friends name, "Remus… Remus… Remus…"

Remus ignores him for quite some time, before Sirius started to poke Remus in the knee.

"What?!"

"I'm bored."

"Fantastic."

"Come practice Quidditch with me and James."

"I'm reading, Sirius."

"But… that's no fun."

"It is for me." Remus started to read again.

"But…"

"Sirius, I'd rather read."

"Why? It's not fun like Quidditch is."

"And you'd rather play Quidditch."


	11. Name Calling: Pureblood & Halfbreed

**Title**: Name Calling: Pureblood/Half-breed

**Summary**: When Sirius is told he shouldn't be hanging around his friends, they have a small talk.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Pureblood."_

"_Half-breed."_

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* * *

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James sits and watches as Sirius stares at his hands, folded into his lap.

"Sirius? What did they say?"

"That I shouldn't be associating with blood traitors, freaks, half-breeds, and monsters." Sirius barely spoke in a whisper.

Remus tightens up and looks away from his friends.

Peter looked at James, waiting for his reaction.

All four of them sat in silence, waiting for anything to happen.

"I don't want to be like them." Sirius spoke.

"You aren't." James replies.

"You will never be like them." Remus says.

"Yes, but I'm…"

"A pureblood?" Remus looks up.

"Yes."

"You're better than them."


	12. Name Calling: Human & Werewolf

**Title**: Name Calling: Human/Werewolf

**Summary**: Remus has some hard time trying to tell his best friends he's a werewolf, so they start to guess.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Human."_

"_Werewolf."_

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"Guys… I need to tell you something."

Remus Lupin stands in front of the dorm, looking at his three friends.

"Go ahead." James says.

"Well… I don't know how to say this." He said, as thoughts started to run through his head.

"Did you forget your homework?" Peter suggested.

"No, Peter." Remus smiled inward; they were guessing.

"You convinced Lily to give me a try!?" James plays along.

"Like I could."

"You've written a book!" Sirius lightens up.

Remus shakes his head.

"Give us a clue?"

He thought, "You're all human."

"You're a werewolf." Sirius guesses right on the spot.


	13. Name Calling: Lover & Lover END

**Title**: Name Calling: Lover/Lover

**Summary**: Remus does some name calling when Sirius won't talk to him in the middle of the night.

**Disclaimer**: I own… NOTHING!

"_Lover."_

"_Lover."_

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* * *

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Remus poked Sirius in the ribs one late night. He heard Sirius grunting, and Remus smiled to himself.

"What do you want?"

"Can you believe we graduate in a week?"

"Moony, do we have to do this now?"

Smiling, Remus replied, "Of course."

"Yes, I can believe it. End of discussion. Now go to bed."

"You're so mean."

"How?"

Remus started to call Sirius all sorts of names and Sirius stared, wondering why Remus was doing this at four in the morning.

"Remus, will you-…"

"Lover."

"Qu-..." Sirius smiled. "Lover."

And then their lips made a kiss filled with passion.

_**The End.**_

[AN: Thank you so much for reading and all the reviews and support you have given me! I appreciate every single bit of it. Take care! I'll be writing more.]


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